- First aired: November 27, 1982
- Story by: Unrevealed
- Duration: 30 seconds
Darla conducts a survey, holding a clipboard in her hand, and asks Porky how many meals he eats per day. When Buckwheat interprets Porky's response, Darla faints in shock.
- The second of three 30-second skits that Darla appears in.
- The last 30-second skit to use its original background music.
- When rebroadcast on September 3, 1983, it was the last 30-second skit to be aired on ABC.